nope

My names Maddie and sometimes I do stuff

just-a-mean-teen:

My anaconda will take whatever it can get at this point

darkwolfized:

image

BOUT TIME

emiello:

Pros of dating me

  • i’m rly soft and squishy
  • i’ll make you hot beverages in bed
  • i’m good at compliments
  • you’ll gain lots of dorky pet names

Cons of dating me

  • ummm??
  • zero i am a god

sunshinesongbird:

"It’s just a movie don’t cry"
*cuts off foot*
“it’s just your foot don’t cry”

tanku:

why is there ham on this cat

Cashier: That'll be $4.03
Me: I only have $4...
Cashier: That's ok, I have the three cents
Me: ...........
Cashier: ........
Me: what are we?

dekutrickortreet:

telapathetic:

when u haven’t masturbated in ages and

image

damn imma stop masturbating for a while so i can grow cannons on my back and launch torrents of water at people

viwan themes